Sloppy Joe
You know what a sloppy joe is, right? A hamburger-like sandwich with loose hamburger meat mixed in onions, garlic, and tomato sauce instead of a meat patty? They're very good too, I must say. But did you know that Sloppy Joe was a real person? He died at a young age. His original name is Joe Smeed, but the kids called him Sloppy Joe because his family lived above a fast food restaurant, so he was always saturated in grease. Every time he went to school, he left grease everywhere and smeared messes every time he stepped in them. Everyone hated him, especially the janitor. But they couldn't expel him because he was the nephew of the school principal. One day, a kid threw up in the school cafeteria. Sloppy Joe was there at the time getting his lunch and when he stepped in it, as always, he smeared barf all over the cafeteria with his greasy shoes. The lunch ladies were disgusted and the janitor was furious. He decided to put an end to this once and for all. "Listen, kid!" he roared "I'm so sick and tired of you leaving greasy messes everywhere, I'm gonna have to clean you off myself!" Sloppy Joe attempted to run away, but the lunch ladies held his arms. The janitor began rubbing a wet washcloth and liquid soap all over Sloppy Joe's body as he struggled to break free. What they didn't know was that they were all extremely close to the meat grinder, which was usually made for cutting up cattle carcasses for lunch meat. Since Sloppy Joe was too greasy to hold onto, the janitor and lunch ladies lost their grip and he sailed across the cafeteria, landing face-first.....in the meat grinder. Inside the meat grinder, Sloppy Joe felt the spinning blades rip through his clothes and greasy skin. He tried to pull himself out, but his fingers flew off and the skin on the palms of his hands were ripped off. The mix of blood and grease made him sink deeper and deeper into the grinder as his skin was peeling away. His stomach wall was sliced open and all of his internal organs plopped out and were cut up. His nose flew off and his face and hairy scalp were shredded apart, exposing his skull and even part of his brain. The lunch ladies shrieked as they saw Sloppy Joe's legs sink deeper and deeper into the grinder and blood leaked out of both ends. There were horrible noises of bone getting cut up and Sloppy Joe's screams got more and more bloodcurdling. As soon as Sloppy Joe disappeared into the grinder, his screams stopped. He was ground into little greasy Smeed-pieces mixed in with the hamburger meat. At first, the lunch ladies were scared. But then, they smiled at each other. They had finally gotten rid of Sloppy Joe and decided to dispose of him before someone else found out. They added tomato sauce, onions, and garlic to the grinder and then tasted it. It was surprisingly delicious. The next day, they served this new dish to the students. They loved it so much, that sloppy joes became a popular meal. By the way, I had sloppy joes for lunch today. What happened to my friends Sebastian, Damian, and Lenka? Category:Creepypasta